DATE: 07/28/2007 12:03:22 / MOOD: Depressed

 

So I wrote this english assignment today... well finished it... It took me all week to get the quotes and background research I needed... Thats a long time, I know... but yea... I really need to pick up my grades, at least just a bit...

Yea I know, your probs thinking a 'make believe' character for this site is failing English? Well;

1. I'm not made up, I am real, I exist and I will talk to you if you talk to me, granted it might take me a lil while to reply cause I am usually quite busy.
2. Yea I am failing English. I am on averaging getting C-/D. No discrimination or insults to anyone who gets lower marks than me, nothingmeant by it. But in my school, its supposed to be an academic, non religious (well fuck me why are we doing prayer and mass every morning basically)..

But back to my original point...

I wrote my assignment... It took me ages, but I finally finished it. And I was honestly quite proud of it. I sent it to my friends and to my boyfriend, and they were all like 'wow that is really good'. So I decided to show it to my grandmother, who is like a ex-teacher. And she, in conjunction with my mother, tore it to pieces.  ... All my hard work and they told me it was absolute crap... It was horrible... It sucked... It needed to be re-started...

And heres the problem... I have to hand up something on Monday... since today is Saturday, that leaves Sunday and then Evil day. And here is the other problem, I have been organising for months nad months now for my birthday party on Sunday (tomoz)... I know I am a little late, but some people i couldnt meet up, and couldn't get enough time... and yes... well... its tomoz and I cant cancel on them... so now im totally stuffed.

and i dont want to fail... i need the marks to get into the uni course which i havent decided is yet... etc etc....

 

Anyways, i really have to reply to some emials etc etc... Gotta get working again... hey....

Someone email sometime!

Love

 

Ympie

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DATE: 09/26/2006 11:30:47 / MOOD: Lonely

Belittled in this world I feel I am, I feel lost in this ultimate scam. I tried my best, And they say that's what matters, Yet how come others still make jests, And my life continues to shatter. I tried my best, I tried I did. But everything I said, Made this relationship forbid. I've tried my best to resurrect, And to gain some respect, To no longer be such a despicable suspect. But to no avail; To you and me, I have failed. I did try, I tried my best. And now our relationships have come to a rest. My life is worth so little, myself I lay to rest. Whispering winds of eternity, Take my soul, Take my soul to places untold. Whispering winds of eternity, Find me windswept plains From these people that cause me hurtful pains. I'm whispering to you, To the lost hopes of affinity, The winds of all life, Take me away. I no longer feel loved, By but a few - And even then we only make two. I once heard some words spoken, Words that have long now been broken. You cannot deny it is so, To you I appear more than low. You told me once That I was valuable, A member of the closest family. But look at it now, as I see it: Have I not fallen into the deepest of hell's pits? I have lost your heart, Your compassion. But I have lost more within myself: I have no spirit; no beating of a heart; I have lost all passions; I no longer believe or trust in anything, not even myself. I am alone for but a few, Those who I cannot and will not name who, But for whom I write this to, I can tell you its not you. Whispering winds of eternity, Take my soul, Take my soul to places untold. Whispering winds of eternity, Find me windswept plains From these people that cause me hurtful pains. I'm whispering to you, To the lost hopes of affinity, The winds of all life, Take me away. This is the last time you shall see me in this way, No more from this very day. Catch what you can, Remember what you do, if it pleases. But this is a firm set plan, And my life is riddled with life killing diseases. Whispering winds of eternity, Take my soul, Take my soul to places untold. Whispering winds of eternity, Find me windswept plains From these people that cause me hurtful pains. I'm whispering to you, To the lost hopes of affinity, The winds of all life, Take me away. Take me away from this life, this very day.

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DATE: 08/31/2006 11:53:00 / MOOD: Depressed

What is wrong with me? Why do I think? There is something different about me, cant you see? I am on the brink. Is it normal for me - so lonely on this plane? But I am not so alone that I perceive... He is there, watching my back Watching my every move, watching me grieve. I am his path and he can see the cracks. He can see, and he knows what is to truely be And he is afraid, can't he hear me call, can't he hear my plea? o he doesnt listen any more, I'm always chasing after him. I'm chasing after the things I cannot hold, I've lost all that I had, its all been sold. And I must say that I am to grow old and so very cold. There is something wrong with me, My mind tells me so. Is it wrong for him to run beyond what he sees, Just to hold onto what he believes? He hides in the dark All alone tonight. I cannot find him, I cannot relieve him of his frights. There was a day that I could persuade otherwise, To lower bright and warm hands upon such a tender prize, But I can see now the reasons why he ran, Ran from this disguise. And when he comes back to myself, Love will no longer be placed far back upon the shelf, And she can be true to herself

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DATE: 08/06/2006 08:12:54 / MOOD: Depressed

Wind behind closed doors, My life is like this now and before. I'm seeking what I can never reach, I'm now beyond your belief. I'm now beyond your reach. Does any of this cause you relief? Crying each night, Crying each day, Feathers and pins, Is this how each day is to begin? Dried salt upon my cheek, Perhaps I need more liquid to drink? My eye's drip too much, Loosing so much water... Fake feathers and real pins, Is this how each day is to begin?

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DATE: 07/31/2006 07:23:28 / MOOD: Poem

What Am I? Can you see me through your eyes? Can you hear the words that I say? Do you notice me on this fine day? A tear you sometimes shed, As you tell me about all this dread. But could you stop and think about it one minute? Before you decided to shoot. My shoulder you can always cry on, Anytime, anywhere. Night, sunset or dawn. But when the water spills from my eyes Who do I have for them to dry? Where were you the night I cried so hard, When my faith in humanity was scarred? I needed you then, But you weren't there, again. I give you everything, I give you all So that you can stand tall And now you leave me to crawl. Blood dripping, down my spine. Your finger you have me around entwined. I helped you long enough, Now shouldn't you be the one whose tough. Just take a look at yourself, Sure your hurt, But who is the truly in pain, Because of you she feels so much shame. You don't realize her insecurities, You don't see any of her agonies. Are you a friend? Do you go by that title? Do you really want this relationship to amend? For you to see is actually quite vital. Kindness is a virtue, Used by others as a fault. Just letting you know this pain that I've been dealt. And to you goodnight. For I shall sleep under star light. But unlike you I shall sleep soundly, I shall be in the arms of one devotedly. Warm and loved, She'll be getting what she has long deserved. What Am I? Can you see me through your eyes? Can you hear the words that I say? Do you notice me on this fine day? Kindness is a virtue, Used by others as a fault.

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DATE: 07/31/2006 07:22:57 / MOOD: Poem

Lower your weary head Hide those tears that you fear to shed Little do they know your pain Your heart continues to wain Raise that sword You've got to fight Don't forget what you believe in Fight for the right They don't cry for the dead

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DATE: 07/31/2006 07:22:23 / MOOD: Poem

A desperate people A difficult decision An impossible plan A living will of fights Life giving water gone bad Little hope remains in little people A flat pebble To skim over the water's path Silent beauty still remains unrippled A fiery hearted friend Deep water traveling Disturbing dinner Water is faster than land The wind picks up A breath taking find Solid ground has dangers Risky fools believe An unexpected loss of hope A flower on the darkest of nights Bring a new morning on Drum beats of gathered hearts The lost becomes found The running revengeful The pain of being unworthy The life changing choices

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DATE: 07/31/2006 07:21:55 / MOOD: Poem

The wind will blow from the west But the sun shall rise from the east Laughter descends from the north Crying drifts up from the south Like waves crashing together A rip is formed Dragging souls of those not belonging Ripping, tearing apart Tears continue to fall Even from some of never before Rising demons of the flaming mountains Dancing dead of the wind gone stale

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DATE: 07/31/2006 07:21:35 / MOOD: Poem

To love so securely, Means you must be insecure. Yet never does the heart break, It bends, twists and turns, with many growing deformities And so often it can ache, But never does it truly break. To need one so strongly, Gives you a sense of belonging. To hold one close, You can hide the pain and fears deep behind your breaths. Yet pain and fear, love and fear, They are all part of being here and there. Aching arms, aching body The pain goes away when you think of that special some body. But don't become so dependant That you can't live without them. Don't forget how to cry, No matter how you are so outgoing or shy. Running from your past, Scared of your future. Where do you have to go? Your life is not going well. You should raise your head and look past the walls of fear, But you cannot do that can you? You are blinded by tears. We all pray that we can laugh again one day, Especially when things aren't looking your way. Just remember to hold on to your lover, Don't let go of each other. Then you shall be secure enough to catch a glimpse past the wall. And with you he shall be standing tall.

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